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Talk:Bitter Sweet Symphony (1)/@comment-5430754-20130204141848
I live up in Osaka, Japan n' often bust tha subway ta go ta work up in tha morning. One day, when I was waitin fo' tha train, I noticed a homeless playa standin up in a cold-ass lil corner of tha subway station, mutterin ta his dirty ass as gangstas passed by yo. Dude was holdin up a cold-ass lil cup n' seemed ta be beggin fo' spare chizzle. A fat biatch passed by tha homeless playa n' I distinctly heard his ass say, "Pig." Fuck dat shit, I thought ta mah dirty ass. This homeless playa is insultin gangstas n' he still expects em ta give his ass scrilla? Then a tall bidnizzman went by n' tha homeless playa muttered, "Human." Human biatch? I can’t argue wit dat shit. Obviously, he was human. Da next day, I arrived early all up in tha subway station n' had some time ta kill, so I decided ta stand close ta tha homeless playa n' dig his strange mutterings. A thin, haggard-lookin playa passed up in front of his ass n' I heard tha homeless playa mutter, "Cow."Cow biatch? I thought. Da playa was much too skinny ta be a cold-ass lil cow yo. Dude looked mo' like a turkey and a cold-ass lil chicken ta mah dirty ass. A minute and so later, a gangbangin' fat playa went by n' tha homeless playa holla'd, "Potato." Potato biatch? I was under tha impression dat he called all fat gangstas "Pig". That day, at work, I couldn’t quit thankin bout tha homeless playa n' his thugged-out lil' puzzlin behavior. I kept tryin ta find some logic and pattern up in what tha fuck he was muttering. Perhaps he has some kind of psycho ability, I thought. Maybe he knows what tha fuck these gangstas was up in a previous life. In Japan, nuff gangstas believe up in reincarnation. I observed tha homeless playa nuff times n' fuckin started ta be thinkin mah theory was right. I often heard his ass callin gangstas thangs like "Rabbit" and "Onion" and "Sheep" and "Tomato". One day, curiositizzle gots tha mo' betta of mah crazy ass n' I decided ta ask his ass what tha fuck was goin on. As I strutted up ta him, he looked at mah crazy ass n' holla'd "Bread." I tossed some scrilla tha fuck into his cup n' axed his ass if he had some kind of psycho ability. Da homeless playa smiled n' holla'd, "Yes, indeed. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! I do gots a psycho ability. It be a mobilitizzle I obtained muthafuckin years ago. But it aint what tha fuck you might expect. I can’t tell tha future and read mindz and anythang like dat n' like dis n' like dat y'all." "Then what tha fuck is yo' ability," I axed eagerly. "Da mobilitizzle is merely ta know tha last muthafuckin thang some muthafucka ate," he holla'd. I laughed cuz I realized he was muthafuckin right yo. Dude holla'd "Bread". Da last muthafuckin thang I had smoked fo' breakfast dat dizzle was toast. I strutted away bobbin mah head. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Of all tha psycho abilitizzles some muthafucka could have, dat one must be da most thugged-out useless. Lmfao. Gizoogle never fails to amuse. -